Thursday, September 25, 2008

A Funny Equation between Sales & Sex

This was way back in the year 2001; 5th oct t0 be precise that i was shaken out of the confines of my lazy college slumber and planted in a workpace setting. I have vivid rememberance of my interview which was short and sweet starting with the usual"Tell me something about yourself" extending to my assignments and later culminating into a statement that you have to wait for the next round. Eureka was the word for me as i was siting in the reception on a sofa which was eclipsed by my own sense of excitement and a large desk beyond which i could see a frail woman who was constantly beaming her smile admidst constant ringing of the phone followed by an answer which seemed taped in her mind" Welcome to Naukri.com". Later I came to know this woman as Sudha.

I was taken upstairs to the second floor; seemed both my dreams and the body were taking a flight on the stairs of my alma mater. In between i saw a huge wall with the most amazing graffiti
and beyond that wall a cabin with a man whose face was hiding behind the screen of an open laptop. A few quick questions and then a firm handshake with the statement i had been dying to hear" Welcome onboard". I felt like a marooned sailor who gets picked by a ship so in way welcome onboard was like welcome to the shore.

The Confusion & Realisation

I came to know later that to reach the shore i had to take a trecherous journey pass the sales cycles and pipelines or PAAPLINES as i used to call them much to the dismay of my boss.
She actually did everything she could to transform me into a good old sales guy, who is as one ought to be.

But i somehow could not fall in line to become a true blooded sales guy who is extra polite with phone manners and so frequent with the line" Yes Tell Me". On the contrary i was a rebel of sort passing loose statements like " Sales is shit"

But it was only recently while sitting with a glass of whisky in my hand at a friends place for a party i realised that " Sales is not shit but Sex"

The terrace is jampacked with people swaying to the beats of 50 cent and Akon next to me i see a bunch of young guys in shimmering shirts which glow with the neon; and their eyes which are constantly zerod on the main gate on a stakeout.

Ladies enter in a trickle and in bunchs but i see no movement except for their eyes as they let them pass. Then all of a sudden the gang leaps into action as if they were locking on to their probable hitlist. I see the guys the bunch of three guys on the dance floor each talking to 2-3 girls seperately.

Fresh from a sales training program which i recently undertook at the Mirchi office, I start thinking is this not "SPANCO" one of the most basic sales training format and the one in vogue at Mirchi
  • Suspecting(S)- The guys on the Stakeout
  • Prospecting(P)- The guys identifying the sets of targets
  • Approach-(A)- The guys on the dance floor
  • Negotiation(N)- Each guy trying to win over the potential target
  • Closure-(C)- A few guys managed to dance with their target
  • Order(O)- We Could leave it for imagination
The point which is to drive is that sales as a function is not science and we dont have to unneccesarily complicate it cause it is as simple as we want to keep it and as complex as we might try to make it appear.
So did i mean that sales is as natural as shit or the realisation came afterwards is a question as good as me being in sales.

1 comment:

Muhammad said...

thats a very nice post. keep posting daily.